Its like I am in a trance, I get a takeaway, pizza, chips, full fat coke and a cheesecake.
I eat the lot
I eat so fast, I don't taste the food
I then purge until I am exhausted
I purge until my body can take no more and I feel faint and dizzy
I failed today....
Recovery isn't something you just do. You have to be patient and let everything come to you.
ReplyDeleteYou suffer from bulimia and binge eating and of course you'll then binge and purge .. It's part of your illness and you will recover if you really want to, but it will be hard.
I wouldn't be able to.. But that might just be because I don't want to. Maybe when I'm at my UGW.. Maybe not.
But I think you're amazing and you need to focus if you want it .
Xoxo
Hi. So 1) Thank you so so so soooo much for being my 100th follower. That's awesome. 2) I feel you on this one. I have..subconsciously not eaten anything today, and probably won't until I go out later with friends. Not necessarily planned, just not hungry. But I get it when it's like a fail to recovery. But take care hon, and thanks for following!
ReplyDeleteRecovery will take time sweetie, it won't happen just overnight. You won't stop binging/purging like that but you will stop in time. Concentrate on trying to cut down if you can, say once a day then once every other day. You have not failed. xx
ReplyDeleteDon't beat yourself up love. When a person gets upset things seem worse and things go south. Just be honest with yourself and say yes, I binged and purged, but one less time today or one more honest self reflective moment is better than a day without. I believe in you.
ReplyDelete<3 hugs
Hey dear. Stay strong. We all slip and binge sometimes. You just have to keep your head up and remember that tomorrow is a new day.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck. xx
yes, babe. don't beat yourself up. recovery is a long road. you know you've done so much by even considering it? :)
ReplyDeleteand i know how bulimia is. it's a motherfucking demon that destroys everything. it's addicting. it's horrible. it makes you feel like shit, but it also makes you feel high. bulimia and i have a long history.
-Sam Lupin
Hey chick. Like eveyone has been saying, recovery takes times. It's hard to break habits and the b/p cycle is just addicting. Just take it one day at a time and picture where you want to be. Who you want to be.
ReplyDeleteStay strong girly, we're all here for you! <3
I'm sorry you struggled so bad yesterday. I hope today is a better day. Remember to keep recovery in the back of your mind.
ReplyDeleteXOXO
Reminds me of the time where I just kept wanting to eat a bag of chips. I had to make myself stop. I'm sorry you're struggling. Hope you're feeling better soon.
ReplyDelete