Monday, January 21, 2013

Stressed and Anxious About Recovery

So I started reading my new book last night 'Overcoming Bulimia Nervosa and Binge-Eating'. It seems so simple, you just do each step and concentrate on fulfilling one step at a time even if a step takes a month or so. Putting it in practice is a nightmare however.....I am nervous, anxious and frustrated.

First step is to only weigh myself once a week - ARGH! and make up a recovery book. Inside the first step you make a table and fill it out with everything you eat/drink, the time and place, how you feel, your thoughts and if you thought it was excessive or purged etc.

The initial step I suppose isn't too hard because it doesn't matter if you binge/vomit etc as long as you record it. Recording it is when it gets hard....I want it to be perfect and having three pieces of bread with my carrot and coriander soup I felt was excessive following by a Weight Watchers chocolate mini roll. I hated having to write a 'V' every time I vomit too. Its like writing failure over and over again. Rah Rah Rah Rant Over...! - Sorry girls :/


  1. don't be sorry! it's great that you're taking your recovery so seriously. i love how self-motivating you are! and i love those cute little food drawings. the eggs are definitely my favourite :3 xxxx

  2. It's great that you're taking these steps, I love the drawings too :) xx

  3. A recovery book sounds like a good idea. They did something similar at my treatment over the summer, but it wasn't as creative as that.

  4. The first steps are always the hardest, it will get easier and I'm so proud of you for taking the first steps on the road to recovery x

  5. I know what you mean about having to write if you purged or not. I feel like everytime I write that down, that I have failed the whole day away. But you're making steps in the right direction and I am so proud of you. We will do this together.

  6. Breeeathe miss Lucie, it'll be okay. At the very least, recording will make you more mindful & aware of your habits. And I love the drawings too, the eyes are so cute!
    Good luck sweetie. You can do this <3 xxxx

  7. putting it in practice does seem scary as shit. it's like 'what if this and that and this and that happens' but babe, i can guarantee that it's worth it. i'm trying to recover right now and even though i'm dying to lose weight, i fixed my metabolism now so i can diet like a normal girl. whatever she is.
    aww babe :(
    just try. you're doing your best even when you think you won't. and i'm really proud of you. you don't understand how proud of you i am.
    also when you said you were staring at my gifs, i just died.
    -Sam Lupin