I went to group therapy tonight run by a eating disorder charity. I got there and waited nervously and no one else with eating disorders turned up :/
The lady that organised it also organises a group for carers too at the same time and invited me to join it. It was really interesting to see what we put our loved ones through. One set of parents were so stupid, thinking their daughter would just get over it. They were deeply worried and concerned but they just couldn't understand and were making things worse for their daughter. I decided to talk up and shared my story and gave everyone tips on how to talk to their loved ones and handle some of the situations they brought up.
At the end everyone thanked me including the lady that organises the groups. They said I was a asset to the group and they all had learnt something.
I was left feeling uplifted, and like I had made a difference but it had not really helped me as such. I had admitted I had a eating disorder and doing so it came at a price. The high lasted around a hour and then I felt strange and vulnerable - so I binged....I messed up the HSGD and ended up being sick.
I don't know what I think or feel now. I am so confused.....?